Flow Stoppers

As I reflect back to my dreams as I child, I recall the plans I made for my vacations to Walt Disney World. I envisioned that I would drive there in my red polka dot convertible with my family and we would eat candy the entire way there. I had a strong belief that I would become a professional gymnast and imagined how it would feel to hold my pose in front of a large crowd cheering for me. I choreographed dances and belted out lyrics while playing my piano as I envisioned my fans waiting impatiently for my autograph. There seemed to be endless time available for my dreams and looked forward with confidence for my future.

So it turns out that I although I have taken some great vacations and enjoy my current career, I never have made it to Walt Disney World, or through the Olympic gymnastics circuit nor have I landed any recording contracts. I learned that convertibles were unsafe if there were to be an accident and that they are typically not sold cherry red with polka dots. I also discovered that that Disney vacations are something that must be saved for. And it was to my surprise to be informed that eating too much candy would make me sick. Gymnasts required flexibility, which I didn’t possess and singing and dancing abilities were reserved for school audiences or my church congregation.

I seemed to take all this knowledge surprisingly well and began to alter some of dreams and plans as I grew older. It wasn’t until recently that I began reading the book, The Ma,’ by Boni Lonnsburry, when I realized that the death of these dreams may impact my current ability to manifest my adult dreams. While I know there are many things that can get in the way of our intentions, I hadn’t considered how my child self may be interfering.

Setting goals and establishing dreams are important in order to launch change in our lives and to create the life we want. First we must take some steps to make our dreams clear, but the next step is to bring these dreams into our realities. It is truly fascinating the power we have to do this!  However, according to Lonnsbury (2013), we must allow the proper flow of energy and beware of ‘flow stoppers.’ We must ensure that energy flows towards our desires rather than away from them. The author goes on to suggest that our child, adolescent, or young adult selves can be ‘flow stoppers,’ This is based around the complexity of our being and the existence of other parts of us.

For instance, my child self may prevent me from traveling to a destination my adult self has been dreaming about. My younger self carries the belief that one must consider the safety, the expense, and limit amounts of really satisfying things from the messages she received long ago. The child self may feel worried and restricted. These types of thoughts and emotions can be the ‘flow stoppers’ for the energy required to launch my adult travel dreams into action.

Therefore its suggested to spend time with your child self and give her everything she wants. By spending time meditating and trying to connect with the life and beliefs of your child self, the thoughts and emotions limiting your dreams can become more apparent. Recall things that may have been told to you as a child. For instance, ‘you will always need me’ or ‘you can’t get any bigger’ may create fears that the adult you cannot do things on your own or that your confidence can not grow.  It can be any simple thought or belief that can limit the flow of energy.

A mindfulness strategy called guided imagery helped me show my child self that she can have or do whatever she wanted. What did I do? I spoiled her! I gave her that vacation to Disney World where she was greeted by all the princesses, mermaids, and the famous Mickey and Minnie Mouse! I let her eat candy until her heart was content. I even presented her with a shiny red convertible (decked in polka dots) with the top down to get her to her destination. Your child self may have had many outlandish or very reasonable dreams. It could be a pony, a different family, a special talent, or a good relationship with someone, but go ahead and give it to them. This technique is intended to create safety and satisfaction for the child self so there is no need to interfere with the adult you. This will create the proper energy flow and free you to continue manifest your goals and dreams.

Spend time connecting with your younger selves and prevent ‘flow stoppers.’  This may be your child self, adolescent self or young adult self. Connect with all three and determine your intentions and allow the energy to flow. You are in charge of your reality and can make your dreams happen!

Lonnsburry, B. (2013). The map to our responsive universe – where dreams really do come rrue. Boulder:  Inner Art Inc.

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  • Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker
    Licensed Independent Mental Health Practitioner

  • Jody Johnson, LICSW, LIMHP, began working at Wholeness Healing Center as a therapist in 2007. Jody graduated from the University of Nebraska at Omaha with her Masters in Social Work.  She received her bachelor degree in Social Work from the University of Nebraska at Kearney.


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