Standing Strong When You Feel Alone
In times of discomfort it is easy to look outside ourselves for reassurance, comparing ourselves to another, or asking for outside validation. It is easy to assume or jump to conclusions that we must be doing something wrong or we would not be in this discomfort. But are we really here on this earth to have a life without discomfort? Perhaps this would be the truth if we would move into growth and change without discomfort. However, often it is through our discomfort that we most often are willing to really look within and make a commitment towards inner change. And through this inner growth we become better people.
Through my journey of life, I have learned that it is in times of “aloneness” that the only real validation that is “thirst-quenching” is the internal validation that comes from recognizing my own gifts and authenticity and stepping into those gifts even over the buzzing of “self-doubt” that may be abounding in my head and reflecting in my outside world. I have come to learn, although, I still find each episode of practicing this difficult, that I have to dig deeper in my authenticity, step stronger in my own love of self, and live fuller in what I know is right for my mission in the world. It is precisely when the world appears to be abandoning me that I have to step in stronger than ever to be my own nurturing support to myself. It isn’t the time to step into self-doubt and negative thinking and talking to myself. It is time to find self-compassion, love and nurturing and give myself a big dose of it. It is through that process that the world will reflect back my own inner validation. For in the midst of the storm, the calm will be found within if peace is to prevail.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker
Licensed Independent Mental Health Practitioner
- Janie Pfeifer Watson, LICSW, is the founder and director of Wholeness Healing Center, a mental health practice in Grand Island, Nebraska with remote sites in Broken Bow and Kearney. Her expertise encompasses a broad range of areas, including depression, anxiety, attachment and bonding, coaching, couples work, mindfulness, trauma, and grief. She views therapy as an opportunity to learn more about yourself as you step more into being your authentic self. From her perspective this is part of the spiritual journey; on this journey, she serves as a mirror for her clients as they get to know themselves—and, ultimately, to love themselves.
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