Wholeness Healing Center

Healing is a Lifelong Journey, and It Doesn’t Happen in a Straight Line

There’s an old adage: “We teach what we need to learn.” Perhaps, in writing, we explore what we most need to consider. As a baby boomer, I’m increasingly aware of how quickly life moves and how suddenly we find ourselves in the “older generation.” With that realization comes a natural reassessment of priorities.

I believe that the real truth is this: healing is a lifelong Journey. Working on yourself to be better is a lifelong journey, and it unfolds in curves, spirals, pauses, and restarts.

You may revisit old wounds. You may trip over the same thought twice. You may feel like you are “back where you started.” But you are not. You are coming back with new insight. New strength. A different level of awareness, with input and awareness from the last “go round” on this healing moment.

“The wound is the place where the Light enters you.” -Rumi

Healing is not about “getting over it.” It is about learning to live with your story in a new way: with tenderness instead of judgment, with curiosity instead of fear.

Just because you are struggling today doesn’t mean you have lost all your progress. Just because the sadness comes back doesn’t mean joy won’t return too. Healing moves like the tides, forward, back, in and out. It moves like a spiral, returning to the same place but deeper. When you stop expecting healing to be linear, you stop seeing yourself as failing when the road takes a twist.

You grow. You change. You face new experiences and uncover new layers. Even years later, something may bring up emotions you didn’t realize were still inside you. That doesn’t mean you are broken. It means you are human. And being human means learning, unlearning, and returning to yourself again and again.

Do we ever really arrive? You go to therapy. You do your work. You journal, grieve, grow, and forgive, and move forward. You believe you have integrated the lesson. You have found peace, and maybe even meaning in what was once only pain.
And then, one quiet day, maybe decades later, a new layer surfaces. A deeper understanding. A fresh ache. A surprising acceptance and softness. And you wonder: how is there still more here?

You may ask yourself, “Shouldn’t I be done with this by now?” You are not alone with that question. And you are not broken. You are simply living the truth that healing doesn’t end. It deepens. Old wounds are not necessarily reopened. Sometimes, they merely unfold further, revealing wisdom that wasn’t accessible until you became who you are now. It isn’t a sign that you have regressed. It is a sign that your capacity to hold that wisdom or understanding has expanded. We thought we had learned the lesson, but then we saw and experienced that the lesson had more to teach.

So . . . do we ever “arrive”? Not in the linear way we think of arriving. There is no final version of you who is untouchable, unshakable, immune to old memories or new insights.

We do arrive in moments. Moments of peace. Moments of clarity. Moments when the pain becomes purpose. Moments when what once wounded becomes the very place that the light shines through.

And those moments matter. They are healing. They are coming back home. Even if they are not forever.

I often say that we never arrive, and it is our work to continue working on ourselves. There is not one moment when we are fully “healed”. There are simply moments when we choose to be compassionate and willing to work on ourselves. Healing doesn’t always look like light. Sometimes it looks like sitting in the dark with yourself and deciding to stay. But you are healing. You are working on yourself, and it is hard work and very rewarding. After all, aren’t we here to work on ourselves, heal, be better because of our experiences, because of our pain? Pain can allow us the growth needed to make the changes.

Let that be enough. Let your journey be real, imperfect, alive. And when the light breaks through, whether in the form of grace, insight, or simply a deep breath, you will know you are healing. You are growing. And that is sacred work. Keep going. Not to “arrive” but to keep “becoming”.

Tags: being your best you means you are constantly working on it, Healing is a lifelong journey, healing isn't linear